11. A taste of sin

Sunday afternoon. Caolu Town, Shanghai. I’m in one of the local cafes. I choose some cake for the Tea-Time and order Americano Coffee – just instead of tea. In my mind – being suggested by how the cake looks like – I have a will to taste a vanilla-cream flavor like in the cake served by the Chinese Muslim, who sell such a cake, inter alia nearby Lujiazui.

With enthusiasm I take the first bite, just couldn’t wait to feel this pleasure made by savor I intuitionally expected… In a second – right after I took the first portion of cake to my mouth – I felt such a disgusting taste, even I can’t compare it. Maybe the only a Japanese bean called nato could be a good example to give an approximate flavor, or just like spoilt egg! Indescribable…!

Within 5 minutes I struggle with this detestation and unpleasant feeling. I try separetly, a cake and cream. Having no choice what to do with this cake, I called the waiter and asked: “What’s bad in this cake? Because it tastes and smeels as it wouldn’t be fresh or something like this…”. The waiter replied to me: everything is fine with the cake, the specific fragrance and taste is made by the fruit called Durian, which – as I reminded myself later – is popular in restaurants and cafes in general as an additional ingridient to dessert, pasta or… pizza.

Almost I wanted to give up with ending this cake, however, somehow I passed through this resist to end a dessert, which by the way is pricy as hell… It was a slow process to swallow each piece of cake. Each new one I neutralized with coffee that luckily I ordered instead of tea!

After 20 minutes or something like this, I ended this cake at all and left cafe as fast as possible. Just when I went out, such a thought came to me: “would our sin taste so bad to our souls as bad the Durian cake tasted (to me)?”. The more I confrimed with this thought during the chat time with my Chinese friend, who wrote me, that Durian is the one of the most favourite fruits among the Chinese, nevertheless, IT IS OFFICIALLY FORBIDDEN to keep it or eat it in public area… Horror! Paranoia!

After I ended the talk, I thought to myself, that Durian will be the best allegory to describe the meaning of sin in the future. There are a lot of sins, people may regret they were tempted to do it, for instance: false accusation of someone who’s innocent, lust, jealousness (this unhealthy one), whatsoever; and it could be nice to memorize to a self such a taste – if you ever ate Durian or you can imagine what it tastes like – to avoid a temptation to these sins.

And this sentence: “Durian is the one of the most favourite fruits among the Chinese…”. A great picture of what a sin is like. We all – or many of us – like to make a sin, because we can always “neutralize” it, and still it tastes somehow, neither bad nor good. However, it’s nice to be aware what you’re eatting, so you may enjoy life at all without unnecessary bad feelings, experiences…

With a such reflection I leave you for the beginning of the Advent. Think about it for a while, give yourself a chance to change some behaviors, if you would say you like your “Durian cake” or whatever with Durian- or what you don’t like personally to smell or to eat. It could be, just to illustrate your emotions and you’d compare your reactions for food or a smell of something with your action in sin that you know it’s bad… If you don’t like it, just spit out it. I think and I hope it will be a good reference to all of us. Now I give myself a time for own reflection and I’m listening to music to get in mood of the nice evening time.

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